Reaching Out, Closing In - 2012

I always advised my children that the person you should be with is the one who makes everything better just by being with you.  When the day has been the worse day and you can't wait to go home, knowing that when you are in his arms you will be able to breathe.  And I have been so blessed to have that connection with my husband.  But then why is it when I am afraid, or sad, or worried I turn away?  Instead of wanting his reassurance and compassion, I want distance, retreating to the private place where I can hold all my emotions in.  Is it not having learned to share, or is it fear to trust him and then have him not be there.

It is so unfair to him, I know.  All he wants is to help and I become a tense, angry, impatient woman that he wants to run and hide from.  The very reason to be in a relationship is to not be alone when the world turns upside down.